I'm Coming Out.

Yes, you read correctly. I am coming out of the closet. This has taken me a long time to write, but I think it's about time. I owe it to my husband and children, all those close to me who already know and have been keeping it a secret (or not so much, like my mom). Ok, here goes...

I am pregnant.

K to the N to the O-C-K-E-D up... again. Yes, for the 5th time in as many years. I am pregnant again. 15 weeks today. So if you look back at my previous posts it might make a little sense while I raged in one and contemplated life and loss in another. So goes the wonderful roller coaster that is gestation.

And why the dramatics? Well, for those of you who do not have children, but plan to one day, take this piece of advice. Enjoy every second of telling people about your first pregnancy. You will get hugs, tears, laughing, eye winks, presents, cards and flowers. People will carry your groceries, open doors for you and ask how you are feeling. Every old woman within a block of you will get a twinkle in her eye, feel your belly and tell you to relish every second because it goes so fast, she should know, her baby is now 60.

And then your second pregnancy? Well, it's alright. You get people saying 'Congratulations', 'Good luck!', 'It's twice the work'. You even get the occasional 'STOP NOW WHILE YOU CAN!' (I thank my sister, who has 4 children, for that little number)

Thus brings us to pregnancy number three. You are lucky to get a, "Hey lady, you knew what you were signing up for." All this while apologizing profusely and dragging along a screaming toddler and grumpy preschooler who both want a new pony and a sippy cup o' juice.

I've only had a few people close enough to me make the daring announcement to family and friends they are expecting a FOURTH, the audacity! One of those being my sister who announced she was expecting her last child, while holding a crying 10 month-old as her 5 year-old 2-1/2 year-old ran around the table terrorizing any relative who looked at them cross-eyed (which was all of them of course). From how it was recalled by my mother, the entire table fell silent, mouths fell open, forks fell onto their plates and everyone held their breath. Until my uncle started laughing, which started everyone else laughing, because, they all thought she was telling a really bad joke.... which she wasn't. Needless to say I don't think it was the reaction my sister and her husband were going for.

So 4 people, I'm outed. Still a little worried here and there but guess it's time to strart spreading the news. The due date is August 28th. Dead heat of the summer (yay!). Feel free, go ahead and say it, "Hey lady, you knew what you were signing up for."